Ring Exchange / Vows / Intentions / Promises
With These Rings
You are fresh words
On the old stone of time
Here, silence honours you
Here, now, the earth turns,
The sun beats, the rain sings
You are not adrift
Among the wheeling constellations
But held by the hoop of love
Ancient as the ring of standing stones
Prophetic as a snow-ring round the moon
Marriage is
Wear your vows well when laughter
Is the wine between you,
Or when night lies like a bolster
Down the middle of your bed
May the cold shoulder of the hill
Always afford you shelter.
May the sun always seek you
However dark the place.
We who are wordless know
Thorns have roses.
And when you go from this day
The burnished stars go with you
When you go forward from this day,
The love that grew you
Grows with you
And marriage is struck,
Iron on stone, hand in hand.
Rings
I might have raised your hand to the sky
to give you the ring surrounding the moon
or looked to twin the rings of your eyes
with mine
or added a ring to the rings of a tree
by forming a handheld circle with you, thee,
or walked with you
where a ring of church-bells,
looped the fields,
or kissed a lipstick ring on your cheek,
a pressed flower,
or met with you
in the ring of an hour,
and another hour . . .
I might
have opened your palm to the weather, turned, turned,
till your fingers were ringed in rain
or held you close,
they were playing our song,
in the ring of a slow dance
or carved our names
in the rough ring of a heart
or heard the ring of an owl's hoot
as we headed home in the dark
or the ring, first thing,
of chorusing birds
waking the house
or given the ring of a boat, rowing the lake,
or the ring of swans, monogamous, two,
or the watery rings made by the fish
as they leaped and splashed
or the ring of the sun's reflection there . . .
I might have tied
a blade of grass,
a green ring for your finger,
or told you the ring of a sonnet by heart
or brought you a lichen ring,
found on a warm wall,
or given a ring of ice in winter
or in the snow
sung with you the five gold rings of a carol
or stolen a ring of your hair
or whispered the word in your ear
that brought us here,
where nothing and no one is wrong,
and therefore I give you this ring.
A Vow
I cannot promise never to be angry;
I cannot promise always to be kind.
​
You know what you are taking on, my darling –
It's only at the start that love is blind.
​
And yet I'm still the one you want to be with
And you're the one for me of that I'm sure.
​
You are my closest friend, my favourite person,
The lover and the home I've waited for.
​
I cannot promise that I will deserve you
From this day on, I hope to pass that test.
I love you and I want to make you happy.
I promise I will do my very best.
I Take
I take
your body where love takes place
​
I take
your mouth where my life takes shape
I take
your breath which makes my space
I take
you as you are, for good
I take
you with open arms, to have
I take
you to have and to hold but not to hold too hard
I take
you for farther for closer, for sooner for later
till
till
death tries to get us and we laugh and we stall
and we tell it to call us some other fine day
because we are busy today taking our tea with buttered hope and
​
I take
thee
​
I take
thee
Bridled Vows (can be amended for husband/wife as needed)
I will be faithful to you, I do vow
but not until the seas have all run dry
etcetera:
although I mean it now,
I'm not a prophet and I will not lie.
To be your perfect wife, I could not swear;
I'll love, yes; honour (maybe); won't obey,
but will co-operate if you will care
as much as you are seeming to today.
I'll do my best to be your better half,
but I don't have the patience of a saint;
not with you, at you I may sometimes laugh,
and snap too, though I'll try to learn restraint.
We might work out: no blame if we do not.
With all my heart, I think it's worth a shot.
Vow: The Simplest, Hardest and the Truest Thing
​
One: We live in love, so finally are come today
(beyond the glad rags and the sweet bouquet
beyond cake or ring or all this fuss)
to this, the simplest and the truest thing for us.
​
Other: If you can say, my love – and hand on heart –
I will love you until death do us part –
​
One: – Hand on heart,
I will love you till death do us part.
​
Other: Then look me in my eyes – and now!
and here! – this kiss we kiss shall be our vow.
​
Vow
I vow to honour the commitment made this day
Which, unlike the flowers and the cake,
Will not wither or decay.
​
A promise, not to obey
But to respond joyfully, to forgive and to console,
For once incomplete, we now are whole.
​
I vow to bear in mind that if, at times
Things seem to go from bad to worse,
They also go from bad to better.
​
The lost purse is handed in, the letter
Contains wonderful news
Trains run on time,
Hurricanes run out of breath, floods subside,
And toast lands jam-side up.
​
And with this ring, my final vow:
To recall, whatever the future may bring,
The love I feel for you now.
​
The Vows
We pledge to wake each morning face-to-face,
to shun the orders of the busy sun,
we promise to disturb each other's peace.
And we will, yes, gaze at the pining moon,
will pick out brine-blown glass-gems from the sand,
will read our future scratched onto a stone.
We're naked, till we wear each other's scent
and recognize it quicker than our own.
You start and finish me, you're my extent.
I speak these words to many and for one.
Vow
Say yes.
That word on your lips is a kiss;
is a promise already made,
We made it.
Love did not turn from hurt
or hard work.
When lights failed, it did not switch off.
When love had no road,
we willingly built it.
We shouldered its stones
and its dirt. So thank goodness
there are days like this when it's easy.
When we open our mouths
and the words flood in.
Put the word of your hand
in mine.
We have learnt to hold to each other
when nothing was given by right;
how love will insist
with its ache;
with its first painful
tug on the guts;
its snake in the nest of the ribs;
the bomb in the chest;
in the Y of the thighs; the red, red
red sun of it, rising.
How love must, at all costs,
be answered. We have answered
and so have a million before us
and each of their names is a vow.
So now I can tell you,
quite simply
you are the house I will live in:
there is no good reason
to move. Good earth,
you are home, stone, sun,
all my countries. Vital to me
as the light. You are it
and I am asking.
Say yes.
Love opens a door
then slams it. It does.
It loses its touch and its looks.
But love needs its fury.
We have fought
and when times make it necessary,
we will again. When night draws in,
we won't forget
how once the streets ran wet with light
and love. Like blood. They will again.
But for now,
we make our promises gently.
This extraordinary day we have made.
Listen –
the birds in their ordinary heaven.
Tonight the sky will blaze
with stars. Today, my love,
rooms bloom with flowers.
Say yes.
The sky is ours.